Happy Birthday Daddy!

Madeleine and daddy are celebrating birthdays today! Late last night, we went to have a short visit with Peanut and had planned to come home and get some serious sleep. Tim worked hard all day and I have just been running here and there for 2 days...and we're just...tired. BUT...plans change. Madeleine decided that she wanted her daddy to hold her, and that's just what happened. The best birthday present a girl can give her daddy!

More cool things happened tonight too...she got a different isolette. Not only a CLEAN one...but a bigger one because she graduated out of the ELBW bed! (Extremely Low Birth Weight) Madeleine's nurse informed us that Peanut can wear clothes now...do you hear the trumpets sounding? Let the shopping...BEGIN!!! I've been holding off on buying her clothes because I didn't want to get things she'll outgrow before she even wears them?! And she's been given some outfits already, but those are bigger and she'll have to wait until she "busts out" to show those off. We can also take blankets in for her too if we want...our stuff, our smells...our all-natural dye and perfume free detergent!!! Even though whatever they use at the hospital smells really nice...because it has no "scent".

Life is good with miraculous Madeleine.

"The eyes *don't* have it"

Little Peanut is shaking her fist at me wanting to know why I haven't worked on her room yet?! She's warning me that if I don't get to it...she'll be home before I know it and her room will be u-g-l-y. I've picked the colors, Peanut...but I'm a long way from painting.

Madeleine had a slight dip last night...she was just "unhappy" and was desatting...her blood gas came back with the co2 in the 70's again so they gave her a bump on her vent...she was back up to high 50's on her oxygen again...and they said her right lung was just collapsed a little bit. The doctor that's on the next few weeks is one of our favorites so far, and she wasn't worried about it being something that won't work itself out. She's been right on about everything so far, so it gave me peace of mind to hear her opinion. She said that she is very happy with how Madeleine has been progressing and given this doc's' skill at seeing the big picture, that was nice to hear.

Peanut had that eye exam today...as previously stated, I was not looking. In fact, I think she got it about the time I was making jewelry with the girls this morning. The results were that her eyes are "premature" which is normal right now, and so far, she doesn't have the eye disease yet that preemies are prone to which causes blindness. She said that if she'll get it, it will be in the first 3 weeks of checking. 2 weeks to go Peanut! She (opthamologist) said that she's got pupils now...those cells are there, and next her iris will form? And her eyes won't be "mature" until 2 week after she was to be born...so in July.

Other than that...Peanut has been swaddled and sleeping...and yawning!!! (It looks like she's yelling and clapping her hands, but she really was just yawning...)


ps...Madeleine peed on me today during a diaper change...isn't that fascinating?!

The little things

Look at this awesome blanket Madeleine's Gma Forbes made for her...it has a matching hat, jacket and booties! She LOVES it...

Today was all about those little things. Baby steps. These days...I appreciate smaller things. Even big changes that are good can be a drain. Here are all the little changes that happened today that even though they are small baby steps in the right direction...still feel gigantic to me. It seems that my sense of proportion has been off ever since Madeleine arrived in our lives.

First, Peanut and Mr. Nitric Oxide have called it quits! He's still waiting by the bedside in case they need to hook up and "have words"...but their relationship has been called off and they probably won't be getting back together! She's tolerating this quite well since she was on her back this afternoon (her least favorite position) and was on about 43% oxygen. When I got to the NICU, she was on 39%...her lowest ever. Next, she has no more skin temperature probe...the little wire that was held on with those fabulously shiny gold hearts? Her weight and growth was appropriate for her to not have to have that anymore. So far, she's holding her temp well.

Another change...they tried swaddling her, and she LOVED it. She's wrapped up like a Peanut burrito now. She's so relaxed, sleeping like a baby! She's also up to 27 ml of milk and loving every drop. The head ultrasound they did this morning showed no change...her ventricles were still the same size, and the clot from her previous bleed was "evolving"...breaking up slowly and being reabsorbed. They'll watch her head circumference to make sure she doesn't get excess fluid, but so far, it's grown normally. There's talk of weaning her hydrocortisone too...and even the rate on her vent...not the pressure, she doesn't like that...but just the breath rate. They also haven't had to transfuse her lately, so she lost her "unicorn" IV in her forehead!

So that's pretty much it for now! A lot of little things. The 5th/6th grade girls and I made jewelry this morning. We had a good time and only dropped two containers of beads! I'm going back tomorrow for an hour to finish up and get them to draw peanuts for Madeleine's 6 week birthday. Grow, baby grow.

Yeah...

Still high on the babe!

Holding that babe was such a high for me...it took me a while to fall asleep last night. I kept having to tell myself to stop thinking about it, and go to bed! 6:30 came early this morning, but I was still buzzed on Madeleine...still needed that soy chai though! On a sad note, I got a lovely latte this morning and promptly knocked the entire thing off the dining room table onto the hardwood floors...(Sadie got a little). Maybe that's God's way of telling me not to consume too much caffeine!

Peanut is doing very well...she's still doing that crazy bounce from one end of her oxygenation levels to the other...I'm going to ask about that one tomorrow. She was down to 43% on her oxygen when we left the NICU this afternoon...it's the lowest yet. She's at 25 ml of milk every 3 hours, and now Tim has witnessed what I experienced a few days back with the "you know what"...starts with a P and ends with a P, with double O's in the middle! I sorta promised my cousin Alex that I wouldn't post any more of those pictures...! But, she did it again...I'm not sure why she waits for the diaper to be OFF to do that? Oh, freedom...

Tomorrow morning I'm going to do jewelry making with the 5th/6th grade girls at the academy I taught at last year...thank God Madeleine is doing so well and I can feel ok about leaving her for some time to do things like this...if they get done early with jewels, I may move right on to drawing class! A card for Madeleine? I'll teach them to draw PEANUTS!!!

Together AT LAST!

The moment we've been waiting for...the first holding...look at that zonked out babe! She loved it...probably a moment she'll never remember and one we'll never forget.
Kangaroo care was incredible. I just sat in the chair and they unhooked all of her lines, even the vent! She had to breath on her own for about 8 seconds while they got the tubes out of the isolette. They placed her on me and covered her with warm blankets. She did really well with it all...and I got almost an hour to hold her. She was very relaxed and slept most of the time, but she started to wiggle around a little toward the end since her diaper was wet. It was either that or us lifting the blanket to peek at her face and take pictures! Before we got her out...she was bouncing all over sat-wise...hi, low, hi, low...afterwards...she was still going up and down but staying in her range and not making her monitor alarm every 2 minutes.
It was great therapy, just what we all needed. Tomorrow if she's still doing really well, she'll get "Koala care".....daddy time! What an awesome day...Deo gratias!

Spooning

Privacy PLEASE! Can't you see Mr. McBearenstein and I are having some "together time"?!

Mr. McBearenstein...roll over, you're snoring!

Don't you just love her little side wrinkles? She's so out of it during belly time, she doesn't even care what her hair looks like. There's some serious bead-head action going on!

Piggy Peanut

Widdle Biddy Toes! Wanna see them a little closer...ENHANCE!! (props to Cute Overload on that one)

I'm badly in need of a manicure. :)

Peanut has been a giant piggy that past few days. She's now up to 3 lbs. 2 oz! It's unreal. She's up to 21 ml of milk, and will be on full feeds tomorrow I'm guessing. She's completely off of the TPN, which is a blessing for her liver. Her PICC line has been removed since she no longer gets those fluids and if she needs medication, it will go in her feeding tube. She now has both arms and hands completely free to grasp tubes and wave her hands wildly in the air! She's hovering around 53% oxygen, still bouncing up and down with her oxygenation...she'll be 80 one second...then 97 the next.

We will be celebrating a double birthday this Wednesday...Tim will be a quarter century old, and Peanut will be 6 weeks (32 weeks adjusted). A father-daughter birthday bash!

Bedside Art

This monogrammed blog is brought to you by Pretty Peanut, Inc.

Was busy by Madeleine's bedside making little artsy things yesterday. I was a bit "blocked" and I rarely get artist's block...it's more like artist's freeze...like an old typewriter when the keys all go at the same time and get locked together. Since Peanut is my inspiration, working on her initials or drawing a peanut usually gets things moving. After her initials, I went back to bird land.
This is the kind of tree I'd like to paint in her room, a sumi-e inspired Japanese cherry blossom.

It's 10:30 am and I haven't been to see the Peanut yet because I've been cleaning the house all morning. When I called, she'd had a good night, her blood gases had been steady and she was in the 50% range on her oxygen and tolerating feeds well still. Good news like that chills me out and allows me to feel ok about being home doing things, but it only takes a few hours and I'm antsy to leave. I've never wanted to be at a hospital so much in my life! It's a good thing that I've gotten over that whole "throwing up in hospitals" thing I used to do!

*Update 8pm*
Peanut is holding steady and doing well. I spent all day with her giving her "touchies" in her isolette. Her blood gas this afternoon was good, she's up to 19 ml of milk now with fortifier in it. More calories! I changed her diaper and helped to reposition her for tummy time. She woke up right as she was put on her tummy so she squirmed for 10 minutes with her eyes wide open and was desatting. As soon as she snoozed off into dream land...she was sat'n hi once more! Good Peanut.

What goes in...

And now...the moment you've all been waiting for. Fresh from the babe...not her first performance, but definitely one of the BEST!

POOP!

Madeleine says, "There's definitely more room on the outside than there is on the inside!"
So...the nurse and I were changing her diaper together, it's hard to reach the other side of the babe in the isolette so it's good to have a pair of hands on both sides. I unlatched the diaper and saw that she had a few little pieces of poo there...and the nurse goes, "Looks like she's still working on it..." and kinda pushes her legs back on her belly a little bit and that was just enough pressure to help her out with the situation! I really have never seen anything like it...truly. I will spare you the details...you can see the results for yourselves.

You have to admit, it's an interesting shape...no?! :) It was also funny today...Peanut had a very wet diaper and I asked her nurse if she can tell how much they weigh by just feeling them. She bet 26, I bet 27...it ended up being 34 ml. Sheesh. What a PEE-nut!

In other news...today Madeleine was 5 weeks old, that makes her about 30 weeks and a day (or two) old. We had her traditional Wednesday birthday party in the cafeteria. I have to say, I'm finally completely OVER the food there...except the cookies. Punkin is scheduled for an eye exam next week and after hearing how they do it...I will NOT be looking. Fortunately, I've been told it's very quick. I'm curious to see...just what she sees. She's still loving Mr. Servo i and in fact, they removed the oscillator from her bed space. She's at 18 ml of breast milk now and will be at full-feeds in a day or so. That means, bye-bye TPN. They already stopped her lipids and once she's at full-feeds, they will add fortifier to her milk to give it more calories. As soon as they know she can tolerate that...they will remove her PICC line. The less hoses and wires on my child...the sooner I can hold her! Their next problem will be...getting me to let go.